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I was the bishops' daughter who went to BYU but didn't go on a mission because I was already married with a 10 month old by my 21st birthday. I think that Doctors have to be selfish to a degree. There are so many potential problems they would fill a book. Of course my parents love each other very much and would not choose another spouse, which is why her response caught me off guard. I've read some of the articles linked to by mormonessays. If you are worries about her or her family trying to convert you, be honest. Hello to everyone in this thread. Look up all the threads of people who are dealing with their true believing spouses -- the guilt, the silence, the bad communication, the hostage-taking.
You should ask Him what you should do, as no one else can see the end from the beginning and no one else has perfect love for you and for your potential husband. He also brought up issues with the church when we discussed religion so slowly he brought to light some disturbing facts and even though I would have denied it, it got to me. I would love to someday find myself sitting in the pew with you, sharing this amazing journey. You are a good person and she can see that. First and most importantly, I see major trust issues in your future if you both think the other is brainwashed. If he's in year 1 of the residency, he's got probably years left finishing residency then fellowship.